Today's Ottawa Citizen reports that very clever scientists have made a new, albeit quite unstable, chemical element. The as-yet-unnamed 112th spot in the periodic table is now occupied, briefly, by a metallic element created by smashing lead and zinc together in the sort of way these sorts of people do such stuff. The Citizen adds that it's not obvious what the new element will be called because typically when physicists do such stuff in such ways they name them boringly for the place they did it, for instance Ytterbium for Ytterby in Sweden and (I kid you not) Darmstadtium. I presume to invoke the spirit of G.K. Chesterton in lamenting this drab terminology and yearn for the days when elements got names like lead, gold, mercury or (my personal favourite) wolfram.

Unfortunately, or fortunately, they can't use the boring "where-it-was-made" naming convention here because this is the second such element made in Darmstadt. Fortunately it has instead been suggested that the new element be named Emergencium because its atomic number, 112, is the equivalent of 911 in parts of Europe.

Go for it, nucleus-mashing dudes.