“Now there’s a guy who lost the human race.”

My own thought April 2 2004 on abject failure (not any specific instance of it, just the general concept)

Someone’s eagle “really took the wind out of [another player’s] hands.”

Announcer on TBS Jan. 16, 1994, reminiscing about the Hawaiian Open 10 years earlier

“Not his finest moment… at least I hope not.”

A friend regarding someone's hapless performance some years ago

“Misfortune is a point of view. Your headache may feel good to an aspirin salesman.”

Tony Robbins Unlimited Power

“He consistently achieves the standards he sets for himself.”

Another double-meaning letter-of-recommendation line floating around on the Internet - I don't know the origin.

“To prevent a red herring from being pulled across the trail...”

Paul Craig Roberts Alienation and the Soviet Economy: The Collapse of the Socialist Era

“The boyfriend...is the heroin- and cocaine-addicted musician, burglar and all-around yuck-bomb”

Rebecca Traister in Ottawa Citizen Oct. 16, 2005

“I’m covered with loser dust.”

Courtney Love, quoted in Ottawa Sun April 16, 2004