“I am not certain that brevity is the soul of wit, but brevity is an excellent substitute for wit.”
G.K. Chesterton in New York Times April 10, 1921, quoted in Gilbert! magazine vol. 5 # 3 (Dec. 2001)
“Bad memory image of FAT detected”
A computer message I received in late 1993 from an improperly installed CD-ROM program, which then crashed (it’s funny because it’s certainly true of me personally)
“Are you lost daddy I arsked tenderly. Shut up he explained.”
Ring Lardner, The Young Immigrunts quoted by George F. Will in National Post August 24, 2002
“Here at the ICA (the Institute for Confusing Acronyms)”
Here I yield shamelessly to the impulse to quote myself again, from Feb. 4 2003.
“’If nobody said anything unless he knew what he was talking about, a ghastly hush would descend upon the Earth.”
“A.P. Herbert (1890-1971), English humorist and politician” quoted as “Thought du jour in “Social Studies” in Globe & Mail Oct. 10, 2011
“Don’t seek out the article ... I am assured that it is well worth the effort in avoiding!”
“A correspondent” quoted by a friend in an email
“your mind is on vacation and your mouth is workin’ overtime”
Mose Alison in “Your mind is on vacation” on his 1976 album “Don’t worry about a thing” according to https://genius.com/Mose-allison-your-mind-is-on-vacation-lyrics
“To top off this public relations fiasco [getting lowly Mary pregnant, a poor girl despite her descent, then leaving her to explain the mess], this descent from the heavenly realm, we have the actual birth of the Son of God. What a botched, low-budget affair that was! Unbelievable! Born in a stable. The son of God in a manger – a feeding trough for slobbering cows! Incredible.”
David Kitz Psalms Alive! (regarding many ways God got his hands dirty lifting us out of the mire of our sins)