“Hair-dos and hair-don’ts.”

Quoting myself again, a thought inspired by I recall not what in August 2001 but certainly reinforced by my own appearance during the lockdown.

“Does your garage door put the ugh in ugly?”

Crawford Door Sales ad on NBC 14/4/90

An election-night pundit “appeared to have had her hair fried for the occasion.”

John Doyle, “Television,” in Globe & Mail November 3, 2004

“Give your brain as much attention as you do your hair and you'll be a thousand times better off.”

Malcolm X (widely quoted online; I was first alerted to it in a paraphrase in the Ottawa Citizen March 7, 1999)

“As for Gussie Fink-Nottle, many an experienced undertaker would have been deceived by his appearance and started embalming on sight.”

P.G. Wodehouse, quoted by Joseph Bottum in First Things #156 (October 2005)

“His head, once shaven, was covered with stubble, uniform with his chin, like a clipped yew in a neglected garden.”

Evelyn Waugh Scoop

“Playwright Neil Simon once described one of his characters as so uptight he even had clenched hair.”

Mary Janigan in Maclean’s April 26, 2004

“A casual visitor might suppose this place to be a Temple dedicated to the Genius of Seediness.”

Charles Dickens The Pickwick Papers (specifically re the offices of the Commissioners of the Insolvent Court)