“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone driving faster is a maniac?”
“Morning Smile” from Andrew Chan of Mississauga in Globe & Mail August 28, 1999 – but the line originated with comedian George Carlin
“I thought I had been working my butt off these last 25 years, but a rear-view glance in the mirror proves otherwise.”
Jane Christmas in National Post March 8, 2001
“As even a Murchison supporter conceded, it had ‘a total want of literary attractiveness.’”
Bill Bryson A Short History of Nearly Everything [re a book by geological writer Roderick Murchison that actually sold well despite its unreadabilty and high cost}.
“The were-Scot appears to be a normal human being, but under the influence of a full wallet sprouts red hair, a kilt and a thick brogue and roams the land in quest of haggis.”
I hope it's funny because it's one of mine, from July 14, 2002.
“Presumably an Appalachian pin-up would be a moonshine girl.”
One of mine from January 5, 2000 – I don’t know if certain newspapers still have “Sunshine girls” but they did then.
“Look, I love [his] work. But have you seen the man trying to communicate without a script? He’s about as articulate as a bag of potato chips. Warren Beatty couldn’t win a debate with a mime.”
Richard Roper in the Chicago Sun-Times regarding a potential Beatty presidential run quoted in Globe & Mail September 7, 1999
“As the historian Forrest McDonald pointed out, Filmer never persuaded anyone by eloquence or logic, since he possessed neither.”
Richard Brookheiser in National Review February 22, 1999 [Filmer being the 17th-century English Tory essayist Robert Filmer, the target of John Locke’s now mostly unread First Treatise of Government, which is now mostly unread in significant measure because it demolished Filmer so completely that nobody now remembers him]
“I could go on and on.” “We know.”
Me on March 14 2015 at an event where a speaker used the first phrase and it was only with great difficulty that I restrained myself from shouting out the second.