“Look Ma! No hands!”
The title of an autobiography by Allan Piper, Canada’s first double amputee of World War II, who lost both hands while training recruits to throw grenades in July 1942, cited by Dave Brown in Ottawa Citizen August 27, 1999
“Reform’s UA initiative currently possesses all the momentum of a fat guy sitting shirtless in a lawn chair.”
Scott Feschuk in National Post May 27, 1999 [so it turned out not to be true, but it’s still a great metaphor].
“The Tories are a hollow shell, but at least they have a shell.”
Editorial in National Post June 7, 2001 that arguably overestimated their condition
“One year I got a very classy embossed ‘Best wishes of the season’ card from the South African High Commission in Ottawa, with a grubby ink stamped signature.”
It was about 20 years ago. I threw it out.
“Omar Alghabra, Canada’s transport minister, once again showed himself to be the antithesis of dynamism. A smooth practitioner of political blatherspeak...”
Kelly McParland in National Post January 20, 2023
“I live by a mantra I first heard on a cartoon. ‘Your boos mean nothing to me. I have seen what you people cheer.’”
Email from a friend of a friend.
“‘Hurricane Hattie, didn’t you read your assignment? Your quiz answers are all wrong?’ ‘Oh, I read the assignment all right! I just can’t seem to remember anything I read… It just seems to go in one eye and out the other!’”
Dialogue in “Born Loser” cartoon (their elision) in Ottawa Sun May 18, 2000.
“My mother was already out of it by this time (not that she was ever deeply into it)…”
Mordecai Richler Barney’s Version