“You should never try to teach a pig to sing: it can’t be done, and it annoys the pig.”
Letter from Matthew Horan of Fort Smith, Arkansas in National Review Dec. 30, 1991, quoting the opinion of H. Franklin Waters, Chief Judge of the Western District of Arkansas in Robertson v White, 633 F. Supp. 954, 959 (W.D. Ark 1986). [How’s that for a detailed, even pedantic reference?]